How to Prepare for Divorce Mediation

Family law orange county ca

Divorce is never a fun experience. No one ever hopes to go through it. There are ways to get through the process that will make it easier. Here are some family law mediation tips to help you if you are going to go that route.

1. Make the decision to go through mediation. In most of the country, mediation is a voluntary thing. Both spouses need to agree to the process. If both are not going to approach the process in good faith, there is absolutely no way it can succeed. Out of all of family law mediation tips you will get, this is far and away the most important. You waste everyone’s time, say family law attorneys, if either of you is not committed to the process. You should get together with your spouse and talk through the benefits and the drawbacks to mediation and decide if it is going to work. If you cannot talk to your spouse about the mediation process, you will be able to go this route.

2. Get yourself organized. The first thing you should do is draw up a list of what you own. Your assets include any property, stock and your actual belongings. This is not the time to start splitting this up, you will do that during the mediation process. Your first list needs to be as inclusive as possible, you can always take things off the list. You may need to draw up a financial affidavit. You need to be very careful with this because if there are mistakes or omissions in it, it will cost you later. This is why you start with a list. This can also be a guide to help you with the mediation process.

3. Decide what you want to accomplish. What exactly do you want to get out of the mediation process. No divorce attorneys or child custody attorneys can tell you what you want. You need to work through your goals for the mediation process. In terms of family law mediation tips, this is a key one. This is a hard enough process and requires a decent amount of soul searching. What are your “must haves”? What are the things you can live without? Only you know these things you should spend some real time before the process begins. You will save yourself a lot of time later if you do this. This includes drafting your budget both before and after the divorce. That will give you a good sense of what you really need to get out of the mediation process and some of your needs may surprise you.

4. Talk to your children. Of course, you want to make your divorce as painless as possible for your children. You need to be able to communicate with your children to let them know as much as is possible, depending on how old they are, what is going on. Do not assume because they are young that they do not understand what is happening around them. Even very young children know something is going on around them. You only compound their stress if you do not let them know. They need to hear from you that things are going to be ok and that this is not because of anything they did. Whatever you do, do not speak badly of your spouse around your children.

5. Spend some time looking into the mediators. You have a lot of choices when it comes to the mediator that you hire. This has only recently caught on so not every mediator has received training in this area and not every state has regulations governing it. There are a number of things you can do to make sure you get a mediator that you can work with and find success with. One of the best family law mediation tips is to ask mediators some questions such as:

  • What is your training in mediation? Do you have any advance training?
  • What kinds of certification do you have? Do you have any other certifications?
  • Where were you certified? Make sure you see the certificate.
  • How many mediation cases have you handled?
  • Did you have any hands-on training?

Whether you go through mediation or not, divorce is never a fun process but you will survive yours.

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